Show, don’t tell: an analysis
One of the first pieces of advice any novice author receives is “show, don’t tell”. But what does that actually mean? And why are the powers that be so insistent on drilling this piece of advice into all of our heads?
“Show, don’t tell” is a short way of saying that you should take the space within your story to explore the feelings of characters, rather than outright naming them. Describing the effects that a feeling has on the character makes the reader empathize with them and immerses them further into the story. Conversely, stating the emotion brings a level of disconnect.
Consider the following two passages.
“Afraid that they would see her, Emma hid in the corner of the closet. It was quiet and she thought they could hear her breathing, so she put her hand over her mouth to muffle the sound.”
“Heart pounding, Emma pushed her body into the darkest corner of the closet. The heavy sleeve of one of the coats fell onto her shoulder. “They can’t see you. They can’t see you,” she chanted in her head, as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut until hoping it would all go away. In the small space, her shallow breaths sounded loud. She thought about using the coat sleeve to muffle the sound, but the thought of her mother’s reaction stopped her. Instead, she pushed her sweaty palm over her lips, her ears straining through the silence for any hint of a sound that would show her where they were.”
Of the two passages, which evokes a more emotional response?
While the first passage states that Emma was feeling afraid, it is almost in a detached way that we, as readers, experience that. Her fear does not touch us, as we are allowed to imagine whatever level of fear we feel comfortable at the moment.
It is also vague because of this. You don’t get a very clear sense of what Emma is afraid of or how she is reacting to it. How afraid is she? Merely a little scared? Or terrified? Each of these emotions is vastly different and allowing them to be interpreted vaguely changes the narrative for whoever is reading it.
Now look at the second passage. The way Emma experiences her fear feels a lot more immediate to the reader, even though the emotion is never stated. We are made to understand the feeling through the description of “heart pounding” or “shallow breaths” and “sweaty palms”. These are universal experiences, for anyone who has felt fear before. More than that though, a reader that is fully immersed in the plot of the story will empathize with the character, mounting the tension and allowing for greater payoff at the climax of the story.
Her level of fear is also specific. We see the exact way that it is affecting her and we can judge how high her fear is in that moment. While we may not have lived through the exact situation that Emma is going through (whatever this may be), we get an impression of her level of anxiety in that particular moment in a way that is familiar to us.
This is particularly useful in stories with fantastical settings. Whether this is fantasy, sci-fi or just a story about something that most people have never experienced, there are some things that are universal. Emotions -and the way they are expressed- are a common denominator in all of these settings, and the simplest way to get an audience on board with an unusual setting. They may not know (or care) about the rules of the colony on some faraway planet, but anger, fear or love are a shared point that they can use to understand a character and their motivations.
Should you ever tell, instead of showing?
While showing is generally considered preferable, rules were made to be broken.
Telling is often the method employed among books for younger readers, for example. With a smaller vocabulary and shorter attention span, things need to be spelled out for children of young ages to be more easily comprehensible.
Another example is during action scenes in a book. If things are happening at a rapid pace, then slowing down the action to ruminate on a particular character’s feeling before continuing may not be the best way to achieve the goal of that scene, so simply stating them may be the better option.
Whether you decide to show or to tell in your story, be sure to make a conscious decision of it. This article aims to make you aware of the reasons why this piece of advice is so widespread and popular. But ultimately, you are the writer, and your story is yours to tell so, get out there, and start telling.
